[freshmen orientation: august 2008]
I graduated from college this past weekend (...more posts on that big event to come!!), but one of the special highlights from the weekend was getting to read my senior reflection at our Baccalaureate service.
This is what I shared on Friday night...
~~
At Gordon I have
fallen in love. No ring on my finger – just a full heart because of the people
and places and books that four years has brought me.
First, I fell in love with studying
politics. I entered
college with zero interest in politics, but since it was a presidential
election year and I wanted to fulfill a core requirement, I enrolled in
American National Politics during my first semester at Gordon. I sat in class every Monday, Wednesday,
and Friday in Jenks 212, with my purple notebook and mechanical pencil, in a
state of terror and fascination: I felt out of place with the politics majors
who would say things in class that seemed so brilliant and foreign to me – and
my professor talked about ideas I had never heard of before, like pluralism and
liberalism and sphere sovereignty. But something happened to me in that class: it
didn’t make my decision for the election, but it convinced me that studying
politics was something I wanted to do. The following spring I took a leap of
faith and marched my nervous feet to the registrar’s office to declare my major.
For the next three years I learned about Constitutional law and the Middle East
and the influence of religion on international affairs and what Plato was actually
talking about in his Republic. I
wrote papers that I, at many points along the journey, wanted to rip apart out of
frustration and exhaustion, but each of those papers taught me that political
systems matter and that studying them prompts me to think about how to pursue
justice and peace in a broken world.
I also fell in love with Boston and New
England. I became
completely captured by the colors of fall and couldn’t keep my running shoes
away from the woods in September and October. I have come to appreciate the
little pieces of New England that make it seem more like home to me – the
candles in the windows at Christmas, the church buildings with steeples, the
small ice cream shops by the beach. And then there’s Boston – I learned to love
the rhythm of the commuter rail, the accent I hear as I stroll the city streets.
I loved walking through the Common in springtime or driving into the city at
night and walking through the rain staring up at the sparkling city lights.
I fell in love with speaking Spanish. Before college, learning Spanish was
just a part of fulfilling the foreign language requirement. But after a trip to
Guatemala and a semester of Spanish 102, it grew into an interest I wanted to pursue
and led me to study abroad in a different part of the world. While abroad I
became Alísa, instead of Alyssa. I learned about the language, culture, suffering
and beauty of Costa Rica, Nicaragua, and Cuba. And through conversations about
theology and poverty and political systems and culture; through tears, language
mistakes, laughter, cultural confusions, and so many meals of rice, beans, and
plátanos, I discovered that I love a different language and I love learning
from the Latin Americans who speak it with me.
I fell in love with people. Relationships happened as we ran
together along Grapevine or laughed on the floor of our apartment after a long
day, or borrowed each other’s dresses for Gordon Globes or cried together as we
shared disappointment, heartache, and fear. When I entered college I thought I
was independent, but as each year passed, I realized how dependent I was on these
relationships – and how these relationships help me grow and love more deeply.
Relationships
also inspired me to learn more
deeply. I found myself accustomed to the steep walk up to the third floor of
Frost during faculty office hours and would arrive (always!) out of breath and
just spill out a hundred questions spinning in my head to one of my professors.
And they would listen. They would always listen no matter how many times I
bothered them or asked for just one more explanation of what this crazy
philosopher was talking about. I fell in love with a process of learning where
I am able to ask the hard questions to people who don’t run away from me, but
embrace me in their office with an open chair, a crowded bookshelf, piles of
papers, and sincere ears to listen.
At Gordon I’ve
also learned that this process of loving is the hardest thing I’ll ever do.
Relationships expose parts of ourselves you wish you could hide, discovering new
places often times takes you away from the people you love, and studying the
world challenges the world-view you’ve held all your life and poses questions
you don’t want to answer. Falling in love also means that you are called to
bear the responsibility of caring for more people and places, more areas of
study. Your heart gets bigger as you open yourself to the new adventures and
experiences, but the ache grows too. But I have found that the more I fall in
love, the more I experience joy, peace, and hope. This transition from Gordon
brings with it many questions and uncertainties. And I am clinging to that joy,
peace, and hope I have learned through four years of classes, experiences, assignments,
and genuine relationships.
I hope that
these four years prompts me to live my life in a way where I am always falling
in love.
